When the shelling started
Julia: On 24 February 2022 my parents and sister were living in the north western suburbs of Kyiv. In the following days their neighbourhood was being shelled and they lost all internet and telecommunications. The local kindergarten was completely destroyed. I didn’t hear from them for 11 days. I thought they were dead. It was the worst 11 days of my life. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t do anything but watch the news and keep trying to contact anyone I knew who might know what had happened to my family.
Julia: Russia’s invasion was such a shock! I still can’t understand that war is happening right now.
I am not sure I am coping at all. I am trying to do every day stuff. With no luck to be honest but still trying. I have no energy to do anything. No mood even for basic things like food and sleep.
Roman and I moved to London in 2015. Of course, I miss my close friends and family and the national food! But I feel comfortable here, there are lots of social clubs and local activities. And I am getting lots of emotional support from the people around me and my community.
But Senor Theodor, our dog, is the one who really helps my mental health. The Saint Bernard is a high empathy breed and he is an attention seeker. Two times per day you have to take him for a walk, feed him, brush him. It helps refresh my brain from thoughts. The routine helps me keep mentally safe.
Senor Theodor
Julia: My family didn’t want to leave their home, but eventually they had no choice. They drove along a supposed ‘green corridor’ into Kyiv, but civilians were being shot in their cars on the way. My sister managed to get a message to me that they were alive and were going to travel to a village in the mountains near Lviv. My dad has driven all his life, he loves his car. But he couldn’t face driving any more after the escape which was very traumatic. They took a train.
Then Putin started bombing even near Lviv, not far from where my parents are now. But they don’t want to leave Ukraine. Most people don’t want to leave. They have their whole lives there. They don’t want to start again in some place where they have no connection, no community, no career.
My sister, Tatanya, has come to stay with us, but at the moment she’s convinced she’ll be going back in three weeks – the same as Roman’s dad. They can’t accept that they will need to stay here longer. My sister likes to keep her coat on, even though it’s a hot day. It comforts her. In the basement during the bombings she would wrap her coat around her and it made her feel safer. The helicopters flying overhead at the march are making her feel really jumpy.
I can’t do anything but watch the news. I’m so worried about my parents. We’ve just moved into our house and were supposed to start renovating, but we’ve put it on hold. We don’t have the emotional bandwidth to cope with that now.
If I had the opportunity to talk directly to the world leaders I’d say, please stop this horrible terror! Blood killings is not a modern way of diplomacy. Do your job!
I have only one wish – I wake up, open the phone and read: “The war is finished. Ukraine is a sovereign state with its borders as recognised in 1991.”
An independent feature written to raise awareness of the war in Ukraine
